Tonight will be my first Weight Watchers meeting in over a year. With all my health issues and doctors appointments, I just stopped going. I mistakenly thought I could do this on my own. But I can’t. I am an emotional eater and my health problems make my emotions run wildly into the night and I like to chase them with a pint of Cookies & Cream. I’m not going to use the old thyroid excuse. It doesn’t help matters, that’s for sure, but it’s not the only reason I have gained weight. It’s because I love food. And it makes me feel better. But now it’s to the point that it’s making me feel worse. I don’t like what I see in the mirror. And most of all, I don’t like the way it makes me feel. So, here I go again.

Weight Watchers is amazing. I lost so much weight the last time I was on the program. I felt good and I didn’t feel deprived. The meetings are key, however. I don’t know if it’s the encouragement and support, or the fact that a complete stranger weighs you in and knows if you have cheated with a Snickers bar. Or two. Yeah…

I want to lose 85 pounds. That’s a lot of weight. All my friends tell me, “Come on, you do not need to lose that much, you’re crazy!” Let me tell you something…I AM CLINICALLY OBESE! And I am very good at hiding my rolls (most of them) underneath fabric. Unfortunately, a lot of weight goes right to my face and I can’t hide that.

Tommy: “Does this tie make me look fat?”
Richard: “No, your face does.”

Yeah, that’s me. What bothers me the most is the fact that I’ve lost a lot of muscle through this recent bout of illness. I wasn’t able to exercise as much and it really did me in. I have always struggled with my weight but I was always toned because I have always been very athletic and active. Well, I am not toned any longer. And it drives me crazy! When I wave to someone and my arm continues to wave long after I’m done…that’s a problem. So here I go. I am determined to lose the weight. My Mom is joining me and we have decided that we are going to reward ourselves next year with a cruise. Neither of us have ever been on one and we’ve always wanted to go. So that’s part of our incentive.

I WILL WEAR A BIKINI ON OUR CRUISE NEXT YEAR!!